The third observation is learning when to discuss something with your date or boy/girlfriend. When you say something of importance will be more valuable and have more weight if you time it correctly. Example: Children are a good example of those who insist other people learn to relate to them instead of learning to relate to others. As we become older and, hopefully more mature, our ability to empathize with others increases, which gives us a much better change of being understood.
Often, when someone is honest or completely open about his or her feelings and it doesn’t work out, the problem has to do with timing. Women, we are especially guilty of this, as we get older we tend to want to rush things when we find a man whom we feel will be a good companion. We then start to pressure them by saying such things “I really like you a lot. I want to know where this relationship is going?” AND IT”S DATE #2! Come on, ladies! Have a little patience. I know it’s hard, but unless you want to keep being single and having nothing but short term relationships, you need to learn patience. You do nothing but scare the poor guy away.
So, when should you ask a question like the one above? As long as the relationship is moving forward, even if it is at a slow pace, DON’T. If you get to a point like six months to a year and he has not committed to you by saying “I really like you and I do not want to see anyone else but you and I would like you to only see me” then and maybe only then you can say something like the statement above. Six months to one year is more than enough time for a man to figure out if he wants to continue the relationship.
However, warning, if you come across that rare man who starts saying “I love you”, “I want to be with you”, in record time (like less then 2 months) you need to take a serious look at him, his past and slow it down or have a serious discussion on why he is falling so quickly for you. Now as you may know if you read my article about who falls in love faster, Men usually fall in love faster then Women, usually by the fourth date, but this does not mean you can start to pressure him as he may not verbally be ready to share that with you. Do not ruin a good thing. Read my article “Who falls in Love faster? Men or Women? This may help give you some insights go to :www.beepwire.com/examiner/x-20224-Sacramento-Fortysomething-Relationships-Examiner~y2010m1d22-Who-falls-in-love-faster-Men-or-Women
When a man discloses new details of his life or asks questions about yours, he is thinking about you are a future partner. Due to the fear of a dreadful marriage, many men gradually test a prospective wife. Men know that when they allow a woman access to their heart, they also are giving her they keys to their soul.
In closing, waiting for those long heart felt talks is imperative, the timing must be right. Do not try to have these types of discussion when you or your partner have been in a fight or are over emotional. And do not constantly keep bringing up the subject. This is the kiss of death for any relationship. Just be patient and the right time will present itself. Act rationally and with little emotion and you will most likely progress and get what you feel is needed for your relationship to continue nicely.
Tomorrow’s article will be “What you call them, they will become”
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