This past Sunday my boyfriend broke up with me. He said that he cared for me very much and I was wonderful and had done nothing wrong. But, he felt “overwhelmed” by our relationship and felt it was moving too fast and that maybe I cared more for him than he cared for me. I don’t know what to do with myself. When you have spent everyday for months talking to someone, seeing them 3 or 4 times a week and then all of a sudden with out notice you are just suppose to stop. How do you do that? I would be ok if we had been fighting and if we were angry with each other…that would make sense to me…I understand anger. I don’t understand how someone could be afraid of love. I don’t understand how you can be so happy, yet it is not enough. Everything hurts now and everything seems unfair and harsh. I just lost my best friend and there is nothing I can do about it. And he tells me that he is “thinking” and may change his mind….I can’t be in a limbo like that. Does you have any insight for me?
While this may be difficult to accept right now, it is better that the situation end now if your boyfriend did not have the same feelings for you. Two people may respect and enjoy each others company but that does not mean they are the right fit for a lifelong relationship. It is hard for some to explain emotions and feelings to another but I think you should try to step back and be grateful that he was mature enough and conscious enough to realize this before the relationship went further. He said he is thinking and you should also take this time to step back and think about what you want. Something I recommend is to keep a journal. I wrote and drew in a journal everyday after my separation and I remember weeping onto the pages of my journal and feeling my heart break with every stroke of the pen. It was only until a few months had passed and I went back to read what I wrote that I realized I was healing. My words became less harsh and depressed and my writing began to look towards the future.
Spend time with friends to pass the time or better yet, take up a new hobby or an old one you set aside. Keep busy and your mind will not focus on him as much. Be careful who you seek advice from to make sure they are leading you down a healthy path rather than one that will keep you in a bubble of sorrow. You want your partner to love you the way you need it and if he knows that is not him them tell him thank you. Thank you for setting you free to find someone who will worship you and love you more than you could have ever imagined.
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